Twice an Ace and Black Jacks galore

[qoh]

The sounds of trumpets echoed in the air- a bright fanfare that was followed by the sound of hundreds of marching feet. It was big day in Wonderland, at least the Queen had said it was. If she has said as such- then it must be so.

The trumpets were silenced but soon replaced with the loud sound of cheers as the Queen ambled down the path behind a legion of red and white cards. Wonderland had been doing wonderfully since it's closing- at least in the eyes of it's monarch.

No foolish interlopers, no un-needed fools to tend to. The Queen was well as happy as she could get at least.

"Ah-...what a wonderful idea. It's never been so peaceful and everyone is minding MY ways."

[Alice]

"Goo-oodness!" Alice yelped when she tumbled head-first through the looking-glass. She had used Uncle Remus's looking-glass to transport herself to Wonderland, after a persuasive yet cryptic conversation about how Alice can reverse her age. "Oh!" Fortunately for her, she safely landed on a comfortable sofa. She felt Dinah land on her back, and she waited for her cat to jump off before she stood. She straightened her dress and brushed back her hair as she addressed Dinah. "I wonder if we'll ever get the knack of it?"

"Miaow," Dinah replied with doubt.

"Come along, Dinah; we simply must find the Queen!" She picked up the cat and hurried. Conveniently, they were transported inside the Queen's castle (though it took the two a moment to recognize this).

Alice soon found her way to the palace's entrance, and she hurried through the hedge maze, ultimately finding the Queen and her celebrating cards. "Your Majesty!" Alice called, louder than usual in attempt to distinguish herself from the loud cheers. Fortunately, her matured voice helped.

[qoh]

"Huh?" The Queen stopped abruptly, causing several cards to plow into her. Of course the woman's sheer size prevented any misbalance- but the cards managed to fall backwards into a small dealt pile.

The Queen, with a profoundly sour look on her large features, turned towards the voice. She brought her self up to full height before pointing a heart shaped scepter at the young older girl.

"You! What are -YOU- doing here!?" she yelled, storming over to the petite blond.

The cards stood around anxiously waiting for just what was going to happen next. The Queen had been in genial mood, perhaps the girl would get off with only a little bit of trouble.

"WELL?!"

Then again...

[Alice]

Alice cupped a hand by her mouth to amplify her voice, as she was still quite a distance from the rotund monarch. "Your Majesty, you must open Wonderland again!" she shouted. "I'll never be helped if Wonderland is sealed, and there will be dire consequences for the world! Uncle Remus has told me so! Oh, Your Majesty, please listen to me!"

Dinah stood by Alice's feet, nodding in agreement with all of her statements.

[qoh]

The Queen gave a short growl, "WHAT!?" she yelled, face contorting in rage before she calmed down a bit, only glaring darkly at Alice.

"Open up Wonderland?! Preposterous!" she bellowed, storming through the remaining cards to stand before Alice.

"Hmph, why should I let more people like -you- in here?" she asked, pointing the scepter at the girl.

[Alice]

She wasn't intimidated, and managed to hold her ground before the gargantuan woman (partially because as a sixteen-year-old Alice actually surpassed the Queen's height). "Because laughter would no longer exist, and and I couldn't be normal again! So you must help me! You simply must help me!"

Dinah, unlike Alice, was greatly intimidated, and hid behind Alice's calves.

[Br'er Rabbit]

*B'rer Rabbit found his way there from a Rabbit hole off to the side of the castle. Uncle Remus had told him to accompany the young girl, in case she ran into trouble. True as it was that trouble, well...usually found him, he was usually able to outfox anyone that meant it for the rabbit. Hearing someone yelling, he turns around and peers around the corner, to see Alice and the Queen, and a whole lot of playing cards. The rabbit had been there long enough to hear Alice's part of the conversation, and heads over to everyone, adding onto what the girl had said.*

That's right! An' people do needs ta laugh! Otherwise everythin' be might unsatisfactu'l ev'rywhere, includin' here...an' why, yo' highness sho' must like t'ave a good laugh evr'y once in awhile, wouldn't ya?

[Alice]

"Precisely, Mr. Rabbit," said Alice when she looked down to Br'er Rabbit. She nodded in agreement.

[qoh]

"I DON'T LAUGH!!!" she bellowed with enough force to send the rabbit rolling if he wasn't braced. She harrumphed and glared back at Alice before slipping into a mask of false sweetness.

"My dear child," she could still call Alice that for the Queen was rather old and (*ahem*) erm..wizened and could still see the dim of youth in the girls countenance. "I've decided to do thins- are you saying I'm wrong?" she asked with a slight growl.

It was rather un-wise to insinuate that the wizened monarch was -ever- wrong.

[Alice]

Alice shook but managed to hold her ground. Dinah, however, toppled.

"What I mean is..." Alice chose her words carefully. "You can decide to do something better."

[Br'er Rabbit]

*He was blown back into the front of Alice's legs. He shook his head, trying to regain the wind that was knocked out of him. Undaunted, he was used to such tempers, from dealing with B'rer Bear, except in this case, the subject was a little more...irrational. He'd have to come up with something good...but what? He scratches his ear with his foot in thought. Then...he grins. He got it! This was gonna kill him, but he had to try, at least? He clears his throat, bowing.

Ah, heh, o-o-o'course not yo' majesty...but wh-wh-wh-what I was meanin' t'say was...sho'ly I s'pect a mos' byoo-tiful woman like yo'self, would likes t'stay lookin' young an' slim as y'do now, fo' all times?

[Alice]

Alice flattened the frontal part of her skirt when Br'er Rabbit bumped into her, and she inwardly scoffed when her partner feigned a compliment. Beautiful, indeed!

[qoh]

The Queen managed to blush coyly at the rabbit's false charm, batting her eyelashes and fanning at him delicately. "Oh you...why of course," she narrowed her eyes and looked at the rabbit.

"Why?" she asked gruffly, casting her beady eyed gaze at Alice for a moment.

[Br'er Rabbit]

*The rabbit glances at Alice for a brief moment, then looks back to the queen.*

Ahh...see, many folk who dun laugh at all, they's tend ta end up losin' theys byoo'ty... s'pose you dun laugh no mo'. Whus gon' happen to yo' byoo'ty?"

[Alice]

Alice felt a personal shame for toying with the Queen's vanity, and felt even more awkward when she listened to Br'er Rabbit 'compliment' the Queen's... beauty.

"Precisely again, Mr. Rabbit," Alice spoke up to the Queen. I do wish Her Majesty wouldn't look at me in that manner, she thought. "To seal Wonderland would be faulty. Please understand, Your Highness."

[qoh]

The Queen gave a start, straightening her royally large figure- fan held to her chest in astonished disgust.

"Me? Laugh!?" she narrowed her black beady eyes at the pair, "I DON'T LAUGH!!!" she shouted again, voice booming through the castle- a few cards that had been dozing in the garden fluttering about in surprise.

"AND IF I DON'T LAUGH!" she gave a coy smile that looked a bit force and saccharine, "No one does- do you understand little rabbit?"

[Alice]

"You do laugh," snapped Alice, very annoyed. Her eyebrows furrowed. "You laugh when you have your way!"

Why wouldn't this fat, pompous tyrant be sensible?

[qoh]

The Queen pudgy hand gripped the scepter, her bead- *AHEM*..ah...uh h-her majesties delicate features becoming red with fury.

"ARE YOU CONTRADICTING ME?!?!" she roared, her uh...p-perfectly set hair coming out of the royal crown.

[Alice]

"You are a-a selfish, illogical woman!" Alice snapped. "If you won't be sensible, then you've greatly harmed the world!" She feigned a smile and curtsied. "Your majesty."

A foolish move, perhaps she knew, but Alice had lost her temper. She would soon regret it.

[Br'er Rabbit]

*B'rer Rabbit scowls a bit, exhaling. He was getting a little tired of being nice, as well.*

W-w-well, mebbe dat's da problem, that y'all always thinkin' of yo' self, 'stead'a others? How would y'all feel, if somethin' y'alls got took'd away, nev'a t'be seen again, an' when ya founds who did it, n'matter how y'begged, an' pleaded...an' well put up a huge fuss 'bout, dey told ya nothin' doin'?

[qoh]

The Queen's annoyance level had all ready reached a rather dangerous edge- the rabbit and girl's words easily putting that volatile temper to it's highest as the Queen's uh...*pause* matriarchal features began to redder. Her eyes narrowing and hand clenching so hard around the scepter that the flimsy gold staff was in serious threat of being broken in two!

"HOW DARE YOU INSINUATE THAT I AM A THIEF!!!!" the woman raised her arm, signaling the card to surround them, "OFF WITH TH-!"

"C-consider dear...t-the dungeons are awfully empty. A-and we just had that moat dug; it would be bad to not put it to use?"

Folding her arms the Queen looked at her husband, for despite her temper and *gulp* f-full figure, he still stuck by her for whatever reason. She hmphed, "All right fine....OFF TO THE DUNGEONS!!!"

[Alice]

"That we won't!" Alice threatened. She reached into one of her apron's pockets, with steadfast certainty that she still had a piece of Wonderland's enchanted mushrooms. Alas, her once confident facial expression dissolved into doubt. "Oh..." She didn't feel any mushroom in her pocket. She searched the second pocket, and still nothing. "Oh, dear."

She looked to Br'er Rabbit with a face that expressed despair. "I'm sorry, Mr. Rabbit." She clutched Dinah closely; the poor cat was even more frightened at what would soon happen than her master.

[Br'er Rabbit]

*He ulped. Things weren't looking too well. Not that they were in the beginning, but things had definitely taken a turn for the worse. He could've turned tail and ran, but his sense of duty to both Alice and Uncle Remus stayed true, and he stayed by the blonde British girl.*

No apology'in needed dere, Miss Alice...why, I's suspect dat ol' queen woulda done jus' dis n'matter what we says. But dun ya worry none...we down, but we ain't completely licked jus' yet, you'll see!

[Alice]

Alice would normally smile at such a particularly hopeful remark, but her face expressed fear.

"I do hope so," she nervously said as she was approached by the Queen's men.

[qoh]

The cards surrounded the two, the spade shaped spears pointed directly at their throats.

"OFF TO THE DUNGEONS!!!!" The garden shook as the cards folded over the duo, capturing them and beginning to haul them off towards the dank barred rooms of the castle dungeons.

Her royal tyrant dusted her sleeves off, adjusting her bodice and marching off towards the castle, no one bothering to ask what was wrong.

They liked to keep their heads on their shoulders.

[Alice]

Despite Alice being older than normal, and therefore with some more muscle, she still couldn't shake off the immense army of cards. And considering she had Dinah in her grasp, she feared that fighting back could inadvertently harm the cat.

And so Alice and Br'er Rabbit were forced into the Queen of Hearts's castle. She was too frightened and frustrated to thoroughly examine the castle's interiors, but she definitely took in the dungeon's gloomy, faintly illuminated atmosphere.

"You will regret this!" Alice shouted as she was shoved in a cage. "And maybe then you will learn some manners!"