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Post by Miranda Wright on Oct 19, 2010 8:02:41 GMT -8
I'm eager to further flesh out minor characters like Lil' Lightning, Frenchie, and K. Sera, and am always looking to improve my writing and characterization skills. So I had to find out what you guys thought. =D
- Is there a character (or characters) who I play believably? Is there a character (or characters) who I don't portray as well (I admit I'm still trying to find my footing with Scrooge)? If so, could I have some pointers on improving, or critique?
- Are my posts clear in terms of description (my Achilles' heel) and sentence structure? Oftentimes I can see a certain scene clearly in my head, but have a hard time conveying it in words, or choosing the appropriate words. Are there other areas I should work on?
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Alice
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"But, you see, Mr. Caterpillar said..."
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Post by Alice on Oct 19, 2010 15:31:56 GMT -8
I suck at these things, but here we go! I've never watched 101 Dalmatians II, so I don't know a thing about Lil' Lightning. I think the only thing I know about him is he's voiced by Jason Alexander, but even that's only because I had to look him up. If I ever do watch the film I'll have more to say about him. I think your take on Miranda and Frenchie are excellent, especially considering that they unfortunately weren't featured a whole lot in their respective shows. I'm probably biased because I thought Miranda was cute when I was a little boy, but I love seeing her here in FK, and I really like your posts as her. In fact, her posts in the Tik-Tok/Eilonwy thread really get me smiling because of your jokes and amusing descriptions. Same goes for Frenchie. Why am I not saying K. Sera? Well, K. Sera is decidedly less eloquent than Frenchie.  Anyway, I honestly think you're very creative with Frenchie and K. Sera, especially with their introductions in both the Beanstalk thread (which I REALLY need to get around to posting) and the Dog Eat Dog thread. In both threads, the characters' entrances are humorous and charming, at least to me. I dunno if funny and charming is what you were going for, but I like 'em that way.  I'm fond of role-playing with you, so I think that means I like your posts! I find your take on Miranda and Frenchie entirely believable, and my hat's off to you taking on Scrooge. Scrooge seems like a difficult character for me, and I'm loving what I'm seeing when he's under your control, so kudos! As for the description issue, I struggle with description, too. I find that typing what I think on the spot, even if it's irrelevant or unimportant, helps, because sometimes your creative juices need a kickstart to get to the good parts. That works for me, at least; I can't make the generalization and say it'll help everyone. I'm sorry I can't say anything more about Lil' Lightning, though! Was this response convoluted enough? lol Edit: Actuallly, K. Sera does warrant a comment. Even though he only says one word ("SERA!"), you describe his thoughts and feelings anyway, which is good and for the best. No matter how gimmicky a character can seem in role-play, every character should have an emotional or believable attachment, and to see even K. Sera having this attachment is truly inspiring, so bravo, Nicole! |
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Post by Miranda Wright on Oct 19, 2010 20:54:27 GMT -8
Not convoluted enough. Seriously, thank you! It's great to hear that I'm doing good at fleshing out the minor characters. Funny and offbeat is what I go for when I portray the Pound Underground, but you think they're charming too? That's awesome. =D K. Sera is interesting because he's got a limited vocabulary and is, well, a flatter character in the cartoon then Frenchie was, so I try to describe what he's feeling and thinking as well. Good to see this approach is a good one! Scrooge is a bit tricky. I view him as being a crotchety old man more then anything, but it's real easy to go overboard and make him flat out mean. He can be shortsighted, sarcastic, and greedy, but he has his moments of kindness too, and I don't think he's the sort to be nasty to people, y'know (I haven't read the comics, so I'm going with his Ducktales incarnation)? Don't worry about Lightning, I don't expect many people to be familiar with him. I'm curious, what do you think about the Great Prince who I need to get more active with ? As for the description issue, I struggle with description, too. I find that typing what I think on the spot, even if it's irrelevant or unimportant, helps, because sometimes your creative juices need a kick start to get to the good parts. That works for me, at least; I can't make the generalization and say it'll help everyone. Thanks, I'll have to do that the next time I post IC. And I don't think you suck at critiquing. You understand characterization, and I have the feeling that you would be honest but polite if there was something off. |
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Louis
Fantasmic Kingdom Member
Listen, I was confused by the topography and... the geography, and the choreography...
Posts: 23
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Post by Louis on Oct 20, 2010 13:04:54 GMT -8
If you ask me... I honestly don't have a single major criticism to make, about your roleplaying. XD
I'm sorry if criticism is what you were looking for, but... you're a fantastic roleplayer, Nicole! You've obviously done this before; and if I'm wrong, then color me even more impressed. You've been doing a great job with all of your characters - speaking of them, I'm really happy to see some of the more obscure Disney Afternoon characters show up, here. Like Joe, I've always had the hots for Miranda. =P Great to see her around, along with Bonkers!
I had never even heard of Frenchie and K. Sera before you had made them, but after looking up the episode (the SINGLE episode, lol) they had starred in, I found they were really fun characters, and definitely interesting additions to the FK crew - at that, I'm impressed at how well you manage to flexibly handle two characters who had barely five minutes of screentime. Bravo, on that!
I can't say much from a single post by your Scrooge, but you sure seem to have him (and the nephews) down to pat as well - I'm mighty pleased to see him around again, after hearing tales of how many awesome adventures the original Scrooge got into. As for the Great Prince - first of all, I'm a terrible person for holding up our Bambi/Prince thread. XD I promise I'll get back to that. Bambi's a pretty difficult character for me to play, especially as an adult - Bambi characters in general seem tricky, especially on a forum like this where they meet up with characters who wouldn't fit in their own world at all. That being said, you do a great job with the Prince, keeping him majestic and dignified, while still personable, in all situations.
I have a lot of problems with being descriptive, myself - sometimes it can be genuinely difficult to take a cartoon character and write them up in a detailed literary-style paragraph or two, lol. But, like Joe said, I think it's best to just let the words flow out, and write whatever you think best gets across the feeling and mood that you want in the post. Don't worry about being perfect and precise at all - what matters the most here is getting across the emotions of your characters, and you seem to be doing a good job with that.
Keep up the good work! :3 I sure hope you stick around here for a while.
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Post by Frenchie and K. Sera on Oct 20, 2010 20:34:25 GMT -8
If you ask me... I honestly don't have a single major criticism to make, about your roleplaying. XD I'm sorry if criticism is what you were looking for, but... you're a fantastic roleplayer, Nicole! You've obviously done this before; and if I'm wrong, then color me even more impressed. You've been doing a great job with all of your characters - speaking of them, I'm really happy to see some of the more obscure Disney Afternoon characters show up, here. Like Joe, I've always had the hots for Miranda. =P Great to see her around, along with Bonkers! Aww shucks, thanks for the kind words, Heffy. I've been roleplaying since my senior year of high school, and I'm glad to say I've improved from the bad old days. The DA gang definitely needs more love. It's amazing to see that Miranda has so many fans -- many pple seem not to either remember her or like her. I had never even heard of Frenchie and K. Sera before you had made them, but after looking up the episode (the SINGLE episode, lol) they had starred in, I found they were really fun characters, and definitely interesting additions to the FK crew - at that, I'm impressed at how well you manage to flexibly handle two characters who had barely five minutes of screen time. Bravo, on that! *L* Haha, it's good to see that pple are liking the Pound Underground! They seemed like they'd be fun to play, and I thought it'd be an interesting challenge to play one-shots. I can't say much from a single post by your Scrooge, but you sure seem to have him (and the nephews) down to pat as well - I'm mighty pleased to see him around again, after hearing tales of how many awesome adventures the original Scrooge got into. That's a relief to hear. I was wondering how I did with him and the nephews in that first post. Anytime someone disses Disney characters as being for little girls and babies, remind them about Scrooge. He's prolly the only Disney character ever to fight a U.S. president. As for the Great Prince - first of all, I'm a terrible person for holding up our Bambi/Prince thread. XD I promise I'll get back to that. Bambi's a pretty difficult character for me to play, especially as an adult - Bambi characters in general seem tricky, especially on a forum like this where they meet up with characters who wouldn't fit in their own world at all. That being said, you do a great job with the Prince, keeping him majestic and dignified, while still personable, in all situations. Don't worry about our thread. Take your time! XD I can see what you mean about Bambi, but I think you've done a good job of portraying his youthful, wide-eyed nature from what I've seen. I have a lot of problems with being descriptive, myself - sometimes it can be genuinely difficult to take a cartoon character and write them up in a detailed literary-style paragraph or two, lol. But, like Joe said, I think it's best to just let the words flow out, and write whatever you think best gets across the feeling and mood that you want in the post. Don't worry about being perfect and precise at all - what matters the most here is getting across the emotions of your characters, and you seem to be doing a good job with that. *nods* Good point. You can't really be perfect, no matter how hard you try. Emotion is something very important in characterization IMHO, so I'm pleased I can convey that. Keep up the good work! :3 I sure hope you stick around here for a while. Again, thank you for the compliments! This place has become my new RP home (well, one of two), and I really enjoy being here and getting to interact with everybody. I'm like the cat you fed that won't stop hanging around your place. XD |
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Donald Duck
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The Quack Attack
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Post by Donald Duck on Oct 20, 2010 20:49:09 GMT -8
Wow, Heffy touched on what I was gonna say about the Great Prince! Haha! Nevertheless, I'll reply to some other points tomorrow, between classes. ^^
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Donald Duck
Fantasmic Kingdom Admin
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Post by Donald Duck on Oct 22, 2010 2:14:33 GMT -8
Sorry, I didn't get a chance to read Great Prince's posts again for fresh comments. I'll try and do that tomorrow. I'd rather give you a legitimate answer instead of a BS one. lol
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Post by lightning on Oct 22, 2010 7:57:08 GMT -8
LOL. There's no rush, so feel free to take as much time as you need.
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Donald Duck
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Post by Donald Duck on Nov 1, 2010 16:38:37 GMT -8
Okay! I'm up to date with reading your Great Prince posts, Nicole, and I love them.  I find similarity in your take on the Great Prince with how I go about with Briar Rose: both characters only have so much screen time in their films (disregarding Bambi II and Enchanted Tales when I say this), so you and I make the most of it here in FK. But even bringing Bambi II into the mix, I will say that you're still doing great! Honestly, the only thing both Bambi and the Great Prince did in Bambi II that pissed me off was whent hey yelled"WOOHOO!!!" MMF. >_O Sorry, I'm opinionated. Back on topic, you're wonderful as the Great Prince, and I'm kinda envious of Heffy for having the pleasure of role-playing with him consistently. Bambi is one of my top 10 favorite movies of all time (how many times have I said this? lol), and I'm very pleased with your take on the Great Prince. I love how stern yet noble he is, and his posts just exude "valiance." Now, if you don't mind I would like to reply to your comment regarding Scrooge! I haven't read a 'crapton' of classic Scrooge McDuck comics. By a 'crapton,' I mean the comics I've read are mostly restricted to Carl Barks and Don Rosa, with some Italian comics here and there. In those comics, Scrooge is only just a bit more cynical than in DuckTales, but not at all to the point where he's a completely different character, or even unlikable. The worst thing I ever read Scrooge did was in Don Rosa's "The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck," and that was in the past and Scrooge has redeemed himself and regretted it since, so, no, Scrooge is never just flat-out evil. He's tougher than the toughies and smarter than the smarties, and I love your Scrooge. I'm speaking as both a fan of Scrooge comics and DuckTales, and your take on Scrooge more than satisfies. And besides, even if you only base Scrooge on DuckTales--which isn't bad at all!--that's the Scrooge a lot of us here in FK are the most familiar with. In fact, you inspired me to start a "How am I doing?" thread of my own, so thanks for giving me the courage! |
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Anyway, I honestly think you're very creative with Frenchie and K. Sera, especially with their introductions in both the Beanstalk thread (which I REALLY need to get around to posting) and the Dog Eat Dog thread. In both threads, the characters' entrances are humorous and charming, at least to me. I dunno if funny and charming is what you were going for, but I like 'em that way. 
I find similarity in your take on the Great Prince with how I go about with Briar Rose: both characters only have so much screen time in their films (disregarding Bambi II and Enchanted Tales when I say this), so you and I make the most of it here in FK. But even bringing Bambi II into the mix, I will say that you're still doing great! Honestly, the only thing both Bambi and the Great Prince did in Bambi II that pissed me off was whent hey yelled"WOOHOO!!!" MMF. >_O